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Car Thief Threatens to Eat Police, Children and Dogs |
 It's been an interesting week for fleeing criminals. From a drunk driver swimming away from police, to a Japanese prisoner escaping in his pants, to the latest story: a car thief threatening to eat his arresting officers, their children AND their dogs.
Paul M. Brock, 39, was charged with seven criminal offences this week after police tracked him down in a stolen vehicle at a petrol station in the Tippecanoe area, Indiana - though he didn't give up easily.
As police approached Brock made a run for it, prompting the feds to set their dogs on him, two of which suffered a bashing as Brock kicked them in the head in a bid to escape.
When Brock was taken to the hospital for medical clearance, he reportedly told police he would hunt them down and eat them, their dogs and their entire families. He also demanded to be let out of his handcuffs so he could assault police officers. STONE-COLD-NUTTER.
Brock was eventually charged with two counts of auto theft, resisting law enforcement, intimidation, operating a vehicle with a blood-alcohol content of 0.15 percent or more and striking a law enforcement animal.
Brock is currently in Tippecanoe County Jail on a bail of $25,000, no doubt paying close attention to Silence of the Lambs and some of Koreas finest recipe books. Tasty.
By Rebecca Jones
Twitter: @RebeccaEJones |
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Japanese Prisoner Makes a Break for it In His Underwear |
 A prisoner serving 23 years for attempted murder succeeded in the first prison breakout in Japan for twenty years on Wednesday (11th January) - wearing only his underwear.
40-year-old prisoner Li Guolin was reportedly exercising in his Hiroshima prison yard when he stripped off his prison clothes and proceeded to climb a 5ft scaffold erected by builders.
Guolin made it over the top and according to a security guard he then "fell on his rear and turned over. Then he ran off at a steady trot."
At the time, the temperature was around 4 degrees C (39 degrees F).
Guolin has since been placed on Japan's ‘most wanted' list and has become the subject of numerous news bulletins featuring vox-pop's from concerned citizens such as one granny who said that she locked her door early last night as she "just couldn't sleep." Bless.
Prison breakouts are pretty rare in Japan, where the justice system prides itself on its efficiency. The Mainichi Shimbun said it was the country's first escape since 1990, when a youth fled a juvenile detention centre.
Nearly 800 police officers have been deployed in a manhunt for Guolin with officers distributing mug shots of the fleeing prisoner door to door. Though, unless he's found some clothes, he won't be that hard to find: just look for the guy with the frozen blue balls.
By Rebecca Jones
Twitter: @RebeccaEJones |
Drunk Driver Hits the Waves to Avoid Arrest |
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 A drunk driver in San Diego, California decided he'd rather take his chances in the water than risk punishment as he swam off after being pulled over by Police on Tuesday (10th January).
The driver, a 28-year-old male, sprinted fully clothed to the shoreline in the Pacific Beach area at around 2.30am and managed to disappear out of sight.
Lifeguards began searching for the man immediately, joined by the coastguard who made a sweep of the area at first light. Both were concerned that the man in question may have drowned (or been eaten by a lone great white shark) but no body was found.
A lucky escape then? Well no, because what the driver didn't bank on was the ‘friend' he left in his pick-up truck giving the police the guy's full name and contact details.
Several hours later, his family called police to say he had been in touch and would give himself up.
Bloody hell, with friends like that, aye?
By Rebecca Jones
Twitter: @RebeccaEJones |
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Pant-less Passengers Take Over San Francisco's Subway |
 Normally, if you're on a train and you spot someone wearing only their underwear on their bottom half, you switch carriages. Unless of course you're in Essex, or travelling with Kim Kardashian, but generally speaking, it's weird.
Well, running away wouldn't have helped last Sunday (January 8th) when a flash mob of bareback riders invaded San Francisco's BART rail network.
The event was (unsurprisingly) organised through Facebook where nearly 627 people signed-up to take part and bare all for no apparent reason, other than to put people off their breakfast.
New Yorkers have been taking part in these pant-less subway Sundays for years, inspiring many other cities to get involved in what seems to have become a global practical joke.
According to ‘Improv Everywhere,' the organisation that first came up with the idea back in 2001, nearly 4,000 New Yorkers participated in this year's subway ride with tens of thousands more participating in 59 cities in 27 countries around the world. This included London who had their no pants day on Monday (9th January) to the horror of the generally reserved British commuter and the joy of The Sun newspaper.
Keep an eye on www.improveverywhere.com for the official video. Hilarious!
By Rebecca Jones
Twitter: @RebeccaEJones |
Celebrity Chef Caught Stealing from Budget Supermarket |
 British celebrity chef Anthony Worrall Thompson has been arrested for stealing cheese and wine from a Tesco supermarket in Henley-on-Thames, Oxfordshire.
The chef, whose restaurant has apparently been hit by the recession, was caught on camera trying to sneak the items through a self-scanning machine on Friday 6th January.
According to The Sun, cameras were installed after Worrall Thompson was spotted stealing low-cost items on a total of five occasions. Times must be hard.
Shoppers at the store were said to be shocked as the former ‘I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here!' star was stopped and detained by security guards before being handed over to the police.
According to the police, Worrall Thompson has been issued with a ‘formal caution' for his light-fingered ways. It's probably safe to say Worrall Thompson won't get away so lightly when it comes to his career, despite his public apology in which he promises to "seek the treatment that is clearly needed."
And what treatment would that be? Cheese detox? 'Why the fuck not' reversal therapy? Either way, we can all look forward to a nauseating ITV show in which the irritating little dwarf goes and visits victims of shoplifting while blubbing like a girl.
By Rebecca Jones
Twitter: @RebeccaEJones |
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