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MORRISSEY SAYS KFC IS WORSE THAN NORWAY MASSACRE

morrisey cat Morrisey says KFC is worse than Norway Massacre

Former Smiths frontman and general Mr Happy Morrissey branded the Norway attacks as ‘nothing’ compared to KFC and McDonalds in a recent gig in Warsaw.

The militant vegetarian, known for storming off stage at the faintest whiff of a hamburger, said ‘’ We all live in a murderous world, as the events in Norway have shown, with 97 [sic] dead. Though that is nothing compared to what happens in McDonald’s and Kentucky Fried Shit every day.”

He has since defended his comments but did not apologise. Morrissey isn’t the only one to attract controversy over his comments. Since the days of John Lennon declaring the Beatles to be bigger than Jesus, a whole bunch of music stars replacing intelligence with wealth have unwisely got on their soapbox.

What’s Blue and can’t sing? Blue. After the 9/11 attacks lead singer Lee Ryan refused to be silenced by the rest of his band as he said ‘’This New York Thing is being blown out of proportion. What about whales? They are ignoring animals that are more important”.

50 Cent’s take on the Japan tsunami was that a bunch of ‘’crazy white boys” would go surfing.

David Bowie on Hitler; ‘’ When you think about it, Adolf Hitler was the first pop star”. Bryan Ferry and Crispian Mills took note.

East 17′s Brian Harvey once bragged in a radio interview about taking 12 Ecstasy tablets in one night before driving, resulting in him being kicked out of the band. Years later Harvey would run himself over in his own car, after ‘‘stuffing his face full of jacket potatoes”.

Sheryl Crow’s ideas for saving the environment were to limit the use of toilet paper; “Only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where two to three could be required”. We hope she washed her hands afterwards.

Eric Clapton drunkenly endorsing Enoch Powell; ‘’Vote for Enoch Powell… I think Enoch’s right; I think we should send them all back. Stop Britain from becoming a black colony. Get the foreigners out. Get the wogs out. Get the coons out. Keep Britain white.”

Noel Gallagher of Oasis once wished Blur’s Damon Albarn and Alex James ‘’would catch AIDs and die”.

However these words still weren’t enough to make him as controversial as his brother Liam. The former Oasis front man has shown his disdain for brother Noel, Mumford and Sons, Bloc Party, Blur, Kaiser Chiefs, Robbie Williams, Keith Richards, George Harrison (despite being in his favourite band), Pete Doherty, Keane’s Tom Chaplin, Victoria Beckham, Russell Brand, Radiohead, Coldplay, Amy Winehouse, The White Stripes, Paul Gascoigne, Ozzy Osbourne, La Roux, Manchester United, The Enemy’s Tom Clarke (who toured with him), Americans, Australians, homosexuals, students and even aliens. He once claimed the ghost of John Lennon visited him, and Liam even pretended to be him for 3 days, as well as comparing Oasis to The Beatles.

He also said if he wasn’t a musician he’d be God. Always modest, he once said, ‘’There is Elvis and me. I couldn’t say which of the two is best.” A contender for the biggest prick in the world of music, it’s no surprise that his own brother described Liam as ‘’ “rude, arrogant, intimidating and lazy. He’s the angriest man you’ll ever meet. He’s like a man with a fork in a world of soup.”

By Jonathan Anderson

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